You guys, I have a degree, can I just please be a Planet Beach employee?
-Everyone is happy, all the time. You might even get to be happy all day too.
-Get to listen and dance to top 40 radio all day.
-You probably actually like and talk to your co-workers.
-Work meetings are about how to look bronzer or what cool new diet pills you’ll carry or how drunk you got last night.
-Get to drink big gulps at work.
-Don’t have to work in a cube.
-No office politics.
-Can read Cosmo at work.
-Can tweet at work.
-Can write the next great American novel at work.
-Get to wear cute clothes to work.
-Don’t have to work with boring, married, smelly people.
-No one will ever, ever ask you to ‘type that up’ for them.
-Going to the doctor could cost hundreds of out-of-pocket dollars.
-You aren’t on a ‘career path’ really. Unless you want to manage a tanning salon. Like, professionally.
-People will assume you are really, really unintelligent.