Being sane isn’t supposed to take an effort. Being sane is the mind’s natural state of being. It’s the absence of a malady, untouched by tragedy, it’s pure homeostatic bliss.
Being sane isn’t considered valuable until it becomes a moving target. Sanity is wasted on the sane.
Being sane is a choice of vehicle, not a destination. No one in the history of the world would feel like a fully functional human being after a week of listening to Joni Mitchell and watching Girl Interupted. However, if you put the work in and feed your mind and body the right kinds of things, it’s no longer the norm to be depressed.
You will never know if you are sane. There are a million paradoxes for this. How do you know you aren’t in The Truman Show? The Matrix? A Brain in a vat? You don’t really, you operate on faith or even boredom. You push aside existential doubt because it’s exhausting to act like it’s important to your day to day life.
If you could apply the 80/20 rule to sanity it would be something like 80% effort 20% biology. Or, to be more honest it’d be something like 60% effort, 20% biology and 20% therapy $$$.
Once I cried because I couldn’t find my hairbrush so I just sat on the floor of my room sobbing. I later realized that it was PMS and went to see my doctor about it because that’s crazy, right? A normal person shouldn’t just have so many hormonal fluctuations that a minor setback causes them to breakdown. She said it’s normal in women. I am a woman, I think I would know?
People don’t like people who aren’t sane. People like people who are laid back. People think emotional people get emotional to cause drama and get attention or just to be a drag I think. In truth, I would love to be laid back but it’s just not going to happen.