If I Dictated Social Politics

The only acceptable first meeting with someone would be in my bed. No, not that way pervs. My room is decorated perfectly to qwell anxiety in a number of ways- soft colors, relaxing scents, comfy blankets. What better way to meet someone than some place I feel incredibly comfortable, and if they get annoying or creepy I can just roll over and they’ll fall through some sort of corpse hatch or something out of my apartment.

It would be okay to cry whenever you got sad or happy about something, or just felt like it. No one at would would be scared of you for the rest of your career if you cried after a stressful board meeting. You’d be considered all zen for being in touch with your feelings.

People wouldn’t wear micro lenses about your sex life. Walk a mile in my shoes, losers.

Actions would always be explained. Like, when a guy is distant you get to understand why instead of having to come up with scenarios in your head and freak out about it. He would just say “oh I’m busy at work” and you would be like “oh cool” and go on with your life and use all your brain space for something good instead of being neurotic.

People would stop owning small dogs. Or at the very least, they would be properly embarrassed about how poorly they train them when they bark/pee everywhere/are generally not fun to be around.